[ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]
You don t hateme, said Thursday1 4 to Thursday5. You secretly want to be
like me. If you want to hate anyone, hateher . She directed this comment at
me.
Why would I? asked Thursday5, close to tears.
With a creaking of leather, Thursday1 4 moved closer to her and said in a low
voice, Because she insisted that your book was full of touchy-feely family
values pet dodo, gardening, a husband, two lovely kids
Three.
What ever. They asked me to do book five, but I took one look at the script
and told them to stick it. She pointed a gloved finger at me. Her personal
vanity condemned you to the slow death of being unread, unreviewed,
undiscussed and out of print. The real Thursday is as single-minded as I
am even to the ultimate vanity of rewriting herself into the guise of little
Miss Granola Tree-Hugger here with no other reason than to protect her own
fragile vanity, Z-class celebrity status and inconsequential public opinion.
She and I are more alike than she thinks.
She stopped talking with a triumphant smile on her face. The other Thursday
looked at me with tears in her eyes, and I was feeling hotly indignant myself,
mostly because what she was saying wastrue . The only reason I d taken on
Thursday5 at all was that I felt responsible. Not just because shewas an
Page 116
ABC Amber Palm Converter, http://www.processtext.com/abcpalm.html
insufferable drip, but because she was an unread one as well.
Oh, no! said Thursday5, giving out a heavy sob. Now all my chakras
arecompletely unaligned can I have the rest of the day off?
Good idea, said Thursday1 4 with an unpleasant chuckle. Why not go and
meditate? After all, it s better than doing nothing the whole day.
Thursday gave another cry of indignation, I told her she could leave, and she
did so with a faintpop .
Listen, I said, also lowering my voice, you can do your
character-assassination crap all day if you want, but that s not important.
Whatis important is that the CofG in all its misguided wisdom seems to think
you might be good enough for Jurisfiction. Five previous tutors don t agree.I
don t agree. I think you re a viper. But it s not up to me. It s up to you.
For you to join Jurisfiction, you need to learn how to survive in the hostile
and dynamic textual environment. You and I are going to spend the next few
days together whether I like it or not, and since my conduct review of you is
the only thing that counts toward your final acceptance at Jurisfiction, you
need to tryreally hard not to piss me off.
Ahh! she murmured patronizingly. She does speeches. Listen, sister, you
may be a big cheese at Jurisfictiontoday, but if I were you, I d show a keen
sense of diplomacy. I ll have the Bellman s job one day and I ll be looking
out only for my friends. Now, are you going to be a friend or not?
Good Lord, I said in a quiet voice, the Cheshire Cat was right you really
arecompletely obnoxious. Is that your final word?
It is.
Then you can piss off back to your boxed set right now. Give me your badge.
She seemed perturbed for an instant. Her all-consuming arrogance had not
evenonce entertained the notion she might actually be fired. But, true to
form, instead of even attempting conciliation, she went into more threats:
The CofG cadet selection subcommittee won t be happy.
Screwthem . Your badge?
She stared at me with a sense of rising confusion. You d fire& me?
Just have. Give me your badge or I ll place you under arrest.
She took the Jurisfiction Cadet s shield from her pocket and slapped it into
my open palm. Without that or a travel permit, she was technically a
PageRunner and could be erased on sight.
Good day, I said. I won t say it s been a plea sure, because it hasn t.
And I walked away, pulling out my mobilefootnoterphone as I did so.
Hello, Bradshaw? I ve just fired Thursday1 4. I m amazed anyone lasted more
than ten minutes with her I didn t. 1
Yes, already. Tell Jobsworth we did our best. 2
Too bad. I ll take the flak for it. This one s a serious piece of
Page 117
ABC Amber Palm Converter, http://www.processtext.com/abcpalm.html
Wait, wait! yelled Thursday, holding her head in a massive display of
self-control. That was my last chance, wasn t it?
Yes.
She massaged her temples. I can do this. I m sor I m sor Soooor
You can say it.
I can t.
Try.
She screwed up her face and forced the word out. I m& soorry.I ll be your
apprentice. Jurisfiction has need of people like me, and I am willing to run
the gauntlet of your overbearing mediocrity in order to achieve that.
I stared at her for a moment. Vague apology accepted.
I moved away so Thursday1 4 couldn t hear me and spoke into my
mobilefootnoterphone again.
Bradshaw, how badly do we need to suck up to Jobsworth right now? 3
I told Bradshaw to rely on me. He thanked me profusely, wished me well and
rang off. I snapped the phone shut and placed it back in my bag.
Right, I said, tossing Thursday1 4 s badge back at her. For your first
assignment, you are to get Thursday5 back here, chakras realigned or not, and
apologize to her.
Thursday1 4 stared at me for a moment, then dialed her own cell phone. I
turned away and walked down the gravel drive, trying to relax. What a start.
I sat on an ornamental lion at the foot of the entrance steps and watched
from a distance as Thursday5 reappeared and, after the briefest of
altercations, they shook hands. There was a pause and then a few raised voices
until finally, incredibly, and with Thursday1 4 as stiff as a poker, she
allowed herself to be hugged. I smiled to myself, got up and walked back to
where the pair of them were standing, Thursday5 looking optimistically
positive and Thursday1 4 brooding stonily.
Have you two sorted yourselves out?
They both nodded.
Good, I said, consulting my watch. We ve got a few hours before we attend
the Council of Genres policy-directive meeting, but before that
Weare attending the CofG meeting? asked Thursday5 with eyes like saucers.
Yes, but only in the sort of we that means you stand at the back and say
nothing.
Wow! What will they be discussing?
BookWorld policy. Such as whether we should be supplying characters to video
games to give them added depth. It s particularly relevant, as publishing
these days doesn t necessarily restrict books to being just books. It s said
Page 118
ABC Amber Palm Converter, http://www.processtext.com/abcpalm.html
that Harry Potter will make a rare appearance. Now, we ve got to
Will we really meet Harry Potter? she asked in a soft whisper, her eyes
going all dewy at the mention of the young wizard. Thursday1 4 looked to
heaven and stood, arms crossed, waiting for us to get on with the day s work.
It depends, I sighed. If you pay attention or not. Now for this
afternoon s assignment: relieving the staff who are dealing with the
[ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]