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school. The world would be too unstable without them. But we never considered
what it would be like for those people to be so connected to Ephemera and not
understand why some places would feel right and some wouldn't." She hesitated,
and Michael heard her whisper, "Just heart's rain. It will pass, changing
nothing."
As she said the words, clouds formed in what had been a clear sky.
"Your mother never found her landscapes, did she?" Glorianna asked, her eyes
swimming with tears,
"No, I don't think she did." He stopped, needing a moment to regain control
before going on with the story. "They first went to Raven's Hill when she was
heavy with me. Devyn's mother's cousin lived there. That branch of the family
had once lived in a grand house and were among the landed gentry. But bit by
bit they lost the knack of it, and by the time Maureen and Devyn came to
Raven's Hill all that was left was a cottage and some land. Including a hill
where the ravens gathered, which was considered an omen of a dark heart.
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"Devyn put his hand to whatever work he could find, and Maureen did some fancy
stitching that she'd learned as a girl, which earned a few coins and helped
put food on the table. And if Maureen sometimes had dark moods and Devyn
sometimes had long silences whenever he worked around the harbor and had to
watch the ships leaving ... Well, such things aren't unusual for a couple
waiting for the birth of their first child, because nothing would be the same
for them.
"They stayed in Raven's Hill for the birthing and a few weeks after until
Maureen felt strong enough to take to the road again. But it was different
now. A woman carrying a baby can't be hauling a pack as well, and one man
can't carry what three people need. So when they left Raven's Hill, they had a
horse and a traveling wagon that held all their gear and provided Maureen with
privacy when she needed to tend the baby.
"Once they adjusted to being a bit... harnessed ... instead of feeling free
and easy, luck rode with them. Devyn found work that paid well enough to put
by a few coins for the traveling days, and Maureen, shining with a new
mother's pride, made friends with some of the women in the villages.
"I remember those years," Michael said, his voice rough with the feelings,
good and bad, that came with the memories. "For a young boy, it was an
adventure, and sometimes I felt so daring that I was traveling about Elandar
when most of the boys I played with hadn't gone beyond the boundaries of
their own villages."
"And your parents?" Glorianna asked. "What about them?"
He said nothing for a minute. "I can remember them dancing together in the
moonlight. I can remember the way they looked at each other, with heart and
heat. And I can remember the bleakness in his eyes when she would start raging
about seeing the same places and why couldn't they find a different road?
"When I was nine, her belly swelled with another child, but it was harder for
her and she was more sickly, so they went back to Raven's Hill. Devyn's
mother's cousin was dying, and they were there to look after her and be with
her in the end. Before she died the cousin wrote up the papers giving the
cottage and land to Devyn to hold in trust for a girl child because the
cottage always went to female issue.
"There was no work for him. They got by, especially after Devyn dug
up a small money chest filled with gold and silver coins when he was turning
the soil for a kitchen garden. But after Caitlin was born, it was like the
village had closed up its heart and its pockets where he was concerned. So he
took up his pack and went back to traveling. The first few times he came back,
he came with pockets bulging with coins and a song in his heart. Things would
be good for a few days, and then she would tumble into one of her rages and
the bleakness would fill his eyes. He'd wait until the storm passed and she
was calm again  until she was close to being the girl who had captured his
heart all those years before. Then he would head back to the road.
"When Caitlin had a first birthday, he sent a present and a packet of money by
way of a ship heading north. A few weeks later, he sent another packet of
money and a letter by way of another ship. A few weeks after that, there was
just a packet of money. We never heard from him again. But the cottage
belonged to Caitlin Marie, since she was a daughter of his lineage, so we
still had a place to live.
"During that time, after Devyn went back to the road without her, Maureen
began sending letters to her sister Brighid, who lived on the White Isle. I
don't know how many letters she sent. She got a few in return, but whatever
was said never eased her heart." His throat closed with the pain of
remembering.
"Finish it," Glorianna said gently.
"When Caitlin turned two, Maureen tried to bake a cake as a special treat.
Didn't turn out right. Don't know why it didn't, but it wasn't edible  and it
was all she had to give. She wept and raged and smashed things." His eyes
filled with tears as he thought about that day, with him holding on to Caitlin
to protect her from the shards of dishes and glass while his mother screamed
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out the pain of a broken life. "She walked out of the cottage  just left us
there in the debris. And that night, she walked into the sea."
"Guardians of the Light and Guides, of the Heart," Glorianna whispered.
Michael wiped the tears away. "You understand my mother, don't you, Glorianna [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]